‘I adore her now’: Mother learns to cope with child’s autism in a country with little help
‘I adore her now’: Mother learns to cope with child’s autism in a country with little help
A Mother’s Transformation
Martha Ongwane now gazes at her four-year-old daughter Rachael with affection, a far cry from the anguish she once felt. Two years ago, the non-verbal, biting child overwhelmed her, leading to a desperate thought of ending her life. Yet today, as they sit on the floor of their home in Mzuzu, northern Malawi, the mother and daughter share a tender moment. Rachael laughs, clinging to Martha’s face, while the 33-year-old prepares nsima, a maize porridge, for lunch.
Stigma and Support Gaps
Rachael’s struggles were compounded by the stigma surrounding autism in Malawi. Neighbors shunned Martha, blaming her for her daughter’s behavior. Told to lock Rachael inside, she felt isolated, with no understanding of the condition. “I poured poison into a cup, thinking it would end our problems,” Martha recalls, her voice trembling. “But my heart stopped me. I changed my mind and cried endlessly.”
Breaking the Cycle
The family’s turning point came through access to expert care. During a visit to Mzuzu Central Hospital, Rachael was connected to Saint John of God, a Catholic-run organization offering mental health services and education for children with special needs. This support network provided Martha and her husband with counseling, helping them navigate Rachael’s challenges. “For a woman to reach the point of wanting to kill her child,” says Christopher Mhone, a representative from Saint John of God, “it means the nation has failed her. Her burden became too heavy to carry.”
Challenging Misconceptions
Malawi’s limited resources highlight broader struggles with autism care. The country has just two developmental pediatricians and three consultant psychiatrists for a population exceeding 22 million. Compounding this, the term “autism” is absent from Chichewa, the dominant language, often labeled as “ozelezeka” (mentally challenged) or “ofuntha” (troublesome). These misunderstandings fuel myths, such as the belief that autism stems from witchcraft. At a recent awareness session, religious leaders from Christian and Muslim backgrounds debated causes, with some claiming magic affects pregnant women, leading to autism in children.
Hope Amid Challenges
Despite these obstacles, Saint John of God works to shift perspectives. Through community meetings, they educate locals about autism’s nature as a neurodevelopmental disorder, emphasizing that it influences communication, relationships, and perception of the world. While government services are limited, the organization’s efforts offer a lifeline. “Practical interventions can change how people see autism,” Mhone explains. “It’s not just a burden—it’s a journey of understanding and care.” Martha’s story now stands as a testament to that possibility.